Have Fun With Adult Dating Services

When it comes to the dating game, a number of things should be considered as adult dating isn’t the simplest thing in the world; for example, the title itself doesn’t mean have fun while dating adults, but it represents the erotic aspect of the dating game. Still, the important part of the game is to have fun by allowing your naughty side to come out and play; women looking for fun may wear tight clothing or low cut tops to reveal a bit of cleavage and show men what they are missing. A more exposed area of the body would be the neck region, which is highly sensitive and the right kiss can give women sensations that leave them wanting more. However, adult dating isn’t purely about the need for sexual satisfaction but exploring other people’s bodies, fantasies and different types of pleasure.

When you’re in a club or bar on the weekend, you enjoy your time out with friends, colleagues etc; in the same way, you can become the perfect date by relaxing and enjoying what you are doing, rather than focusing on why you are here; good dancers and cooks love cooking and dancing, this is why they are good at their professions. A more simple explanation of this would be that when you love and enjoying doing what you do, you tend to spend more time and effect doing it to get the best results possible. Look at the way gamers play video games, they spend endless hours in front of the t.v trying to get a higher score because they know the results will be rewarding; similarly, adult dating should be enjoyed and seen as a fun encounter- who knows what it could lead to. You may even end up meeting your life partner!

Although a lot of you date to meet your prospective life partners, date because it’s fun, not because you have to. If it is not fun, then would you bother doing it?! No right? If you don’t enjoying dating then don’t just sit through another gruesome date, change it by doing something different. For those of you, who want to cut to the chase and forget the wining and dining part, try erotic adult dating, which is exactly what it says on the tin-EROTIC. It’s a form of dating that doesn’t require dating; a bedroom, sexy lingerie and explicit fantasies will do.

Just a few last points for you to consider- when you date because you enjoy it you allow others to feel good about themselves, also giving you a more than likely chance of a second or third date. When you represent yourself as a fun and happy person, other people will love to bag a date you and before you know it, you’ll be the most popular person in town. If this article sounds too good to be true, than go ahead and try enjoying your next date, you’ll come back thanking the author.

Sex Instructional Videos – Watch and Learn!

Although it’s evident that people nowadays are educated in the matter of sex, there are still those who need a little bit of help in that department. Whether you’re just starting out to become sexually active, or you’re in a relationship with a dwindling sex life, sex instructional videos may just be the thing you need. Sex can become quite a sensual and pleasurable activity, as long as you know exactly what you’re doing and why you’re doing it. Let sex instructional videos teach you a thing or two, and who knows? You might just discover as whole new side to you.

Sex instructional videos are great as it can help you spice up your bedroom routine with your lover. With different tips and techniques that you can learn from these videos, you’ll be able to become a better sexual partner. These videos can also help you let go of your inhibitions and your partner’s as well and teach you to be more confident in your own skin, no matter what body type you have. And because it’s highly recommended that you watch sex instructional videos with your lover, it can also possibly help strengthen the relationship.

You may be thinking, what makes sex instructional vids any different from porn videos? Though both videos will show people having sexual intercourse, you’ll actually learn something from instructional videos as it usually includes a narrative or a step by step guide. Whereas sex instructional videos aim to give you a better understanding of your body and how you can work it during sex, porn on the other hand will just show people having sex. If you think that sex is just like what you’ve seen on porn movies, you’ll be surprised to know that there is more to it than just the act itself. There’s foreplay, there’s romance and there are techniques that can help you make the whole act a mind blowing experience.

If you’re interested to know how you can your hands on sex instructional videos, you have a few choices. Depending on where you live and how your culture perceives sex, you might find it really easy or a bit challenging to acquire these videos. If you have an adult bookstore or a sex shop in your community, you can start your search there. You can also check stores that sell movies and DVDs and look for the adult section.

You can also look for online sites that sell sex instructional vids if you want to shop in the comforts of your own home. Although you’ll find a wide selection of different titles and types online, do take your time in choosing a video for you. Make sure that you check the production company and the description thoroughly if you don’t want to end up with cheap porn that was packaged as an instructional video. Look up reviews on which titles would be best suited for you. Don’t forget to ask your lover’s opinion on which titles to get so that you can come to a mutual agreement on what type of instructional video would best benefit you both.

Sexual and Gender Identity Disorders

Gender identity disorder is generally called transexuallism. Transvestism refers to the practice of obtaining sexual pleasure by dressing in the clothes of the opposite sex. Today the term cross-dressing is more commonly used because it does not allow for a mistake of transsexualism, which is a complete gender change from the original sex. Transvestism is a paraphilia for which the essential feature is intense sexual urges and sexually arousing fantasies involving dressing in clothing of those of the opposite sex. It is extremely important to note that just because an individual is classified as a transvestite does not mean that they are necessarily homosexual. Extensive studies have been conducted to show that transvestites are not homosexual in many documented cases. Many psychiatric concepts have been used to try and explain why transvestism is prominent in certain individuals, such as the constitutional predisposition of unknown origin known as degeneration. Degeneration referred to an innate neurologic weakness that is transmitted with increased severity to future generations and produced deviations from the norm. Despite there being many theories on transvestism, there are no commonly accepted ideas because human sexual disorders can be extremely difficult to understand. In some cases, transvestism can become so prominent in an individual that they become transsexual. An individual who is transsexual usually begins with taking hormone injections and undergoes plastic surgeries in order to change their sex organs to the opposite sex. While transvestism is not widely accepted as a norm today, society has generally learned to accept the idea that some individuals are born with this sexual disorder.

Sexual sadism could as well be identified as paraphilia. Someone who delivers sexual sadism is called a sadist. The administered humiliation, pain and suffering could either be psychological or physical. The pain, humiliation and suffering may also cause injuries or death to the person receiving them. During a sadistic behavior, the person who is receiving the pain or humiliation may not be a willing partner. Though, sadists usually live their daily lives in agony and impairment because of the aggressive behaviors or cruel fantasies.

There are many assumptions to the cause of sexual sadism; some are branching from the psychoanalytic group. For example, the psychoanalysis method implied that childhood trauma such as sexual abuse or major childhood incidents can reveal itself in nonsensical behavior. Because of the test results finding by neuropsychological and neurological from sex offenders, some psychologists tend to believe that sexual sadism might be genetic or due to biological factors. Even though the desire for sexual sadism could begin during one’s infancy, the commencement of active sexual sadism normally take place throughout early adulthood. However, the real cause of sexual sadism is still unknown. Also, sadists are not easily diagnosed. Some are forced by family members, friends or court order to seek therapy, which often helps with the treatment of sexual sadism.

In addition, sexual masochism is the opposite of sexual sadism. The masochist feels excited when receiving humiliation, pain and suffering. The physical actions of a masochistic could involve several different activities such as: cutting, piercing, beating, blindfolding, electrical shock, being urinated or defecated on, forced to bark, verbally abused, and forced to cross-dress. One could be identified as a masochist after receiving these symptoms for at least six months; however, it is known that men are found to be more sexual masochists than women. The cause for sexual masochism is also unknown. Based on learning theory, sexual masochists were initiated because of suppression from unsuitable sexual fantasies. In today’s society, most of the sexual fantasies are derived from the conscious and unconscious state of mind. Some psychologists believe that masochists enjoy receiving the pain and humiliation in order to feel empowered.

Very few sadomasochism search for help with a therapist or a social worker. Sadomasochism that tends not to seek help often gets into trouble due to sexual variations. The level of tensions by society increases toward people with bizarre sexual preferences. Although, the cause of sadomasochism is unknown, the disorder can be treated. Similar to other types of paraphilia, treatment is mainly dependent on the person’s desire and willingness to change. Numerous forms of therapy such as: psychotherapy, cognitive behavioral therapy, aversion and positive behavioral therapy approaches, reality therapy, medications, hormonal treatment, reconditioning and restructuring techniques have been found effective in treating sadomasochism. An additional method that can be used to treat sadomasochism is social skills training. Social skills training is one of a kind that needs to develop within healthy family relations; however, it could be that some people who developed sadistic and masochistic behavior may perhaps in part, because they do not know how to form healthy relationships, whether sexual or nonsexual, with other people. Even though, social skill training is not a substitute for medications or psychotherapy for sadistic and masochistic, but it sure can be useful as an adjunctive treatment.

In comparison, a sadist is one who enjoys giving pain during sexual intercourse while a masochist enjoys receiving the pain giving by the sadist also known as sadomasochism. According to several psychologists, including Sigmund Freud, most sadomasochism is upper or middle class men and women who are highly educated and hold professional jobs. The necessary element is not the pain or repression itself, instead it is the facts that the sadist most of the time has more power or controlled over the masochist.

Another known sexual disorder is forced sexual behavior, which is generally broken down into three different areas: rape, sexual abuse of children, and sexual harassment. Rape is generally defined as the act of forcing sexual activity on an unwilling person. Over the past few decades rape has become increasingly prominent in the United States, so much so that a reported one in six women have been raped. Rapists generally do not have a distinct profile, but several theories exist as to some of the reasons why men choose to rape women. Others believe in a cycle of abuse in which men that were abused as children are more likely to engage in acts of sexual misconduct such as rape. This theory is especially prevalent when talking about the sexual abuse of children, which includes incest, child molestation, and pedophilia. Incest refers to sexual relations between relatives. Incest is prevalent in many cases where there has been a cycle of abuse and a parent sexually abuses their own child. Child molestation refers to the sexual behavior with a child without force or direct threat of force. This form of forced sexual behavior is still considered forced because a child can’t legally consent to the act. This form of forced sexual behavior can be equally as damaging to a child simply from the mental distress it puts the child through. Pedophilia refers to the persistent sexual interest in children who have not reached puberty. Most pedophiles are men while the victims are young females, but there are still plenty of reported cases where the victim is a male and the pedophile is a female. Many pedophiles also commit the other acts of forced sexual abuse and continue the acts throughout their lifetime. Sexual harassment is the final act of forced sexual behavior that is included in this discussion. Sexual harassment refers to the unwanted sexual advances, comments, or any other form of coercive sexual behavior by others. Sexual harassment is so prevalent in the United States today, especially in the workplace, that most jobs promote sexual harassment awareness within the first week of being hired. Just because an individual has not committed the actual act of touching another person does not mean that it can’t be equally as damaging.

In today’s lifecycle, people have different ways of expressing their desires as a voyeur or exhibitionist. In most cases, they are harmless. Voyeurism and exhibitionism are two sexual activities, but the two are both engaged with different meanings. Both voyeurism and exhibitionism are considered paraphilia. Voyeurism is when one individual watches the other individual undress his or her clothes during a sexual activity, such as taking a shower or getting undressed for bed. The term voyeur comes from the French, and means “one who looks”. Men are the main the suspects to be called a voyeur. A person is considered a voyeur when he or she is caught sneaking to watch a person undress, and he or she gets aroused by watching the person take his or her clothes off. Most victims are complete strangers to the voyeur. When a person is listening to a sexual conversation over the telephone, he or she is performing a type of voyeurism also. A stranger may never know that he or she is being watched by a voyeur. Women can be caught being a voyeur throughout life too. Voyeurs are in the dark people. They rather stay hidden, and never be seen because of the embarrassment, but they love to watch a stranger take off his or her clothes. Most men who struggle to fulfill their own sex life, are the main ones diagnosed as a voyeur. A voyeur must want to better his or her behavior in order to let go of the bad habit.

A person could have multiple types of fetishism going in his or her life. Amputee, breast, sexual, foot, etc. are all different types of fetishism. When a person has a sexual fetishism, this act can be very dangerous and scary to the innocent bystander. Fetishism is a disorder that is characterized when there is a pathological assignment of sexual fixation. Fetishism can be looked at as harassment by many different people. Harassments can happen at any time, place and by any person. Fetishism is found primarily in heterosexual men. The male gender outnumbers the female gender when it comes to voyeurism, exhibitionism, and fetishism. The male gender is always trying to find a quick way to get aroused. Anyone can be a victim when it comes to voyeurism and exhibitionism. People still do not understand the actions of either behavior. Although voyeurs and exhibitionist know that they are risking their life with their actions; however, they still feel like they cannot control their behavior. They rather get in trouble for their actions, rather than seek help.

Online Dating – The 5 Biggest Mistakes People Are Making And Striking Out

Gentlemen, STOP your engines! Take a deep breath and think about it for a second! What was the first thing you learned back in high school. You know, when girls first started looking good to you. When they stopped being ICCKKY! Play it cool. Don’t seem desperate, and in a way make her wonder: Is he interested in me? Which brings us to our number 1 mistake.

1- Whatever you do, don’t come off desperate. 9 out of the 10 emails I get have these dreaded phrases in them “Please” “I’d give anything to….” “Oh my god I can’t believe” “What will it take” Any guy that seems desperate makes a gal wonder. “Hmm.. Why is this lad having such a hard time meeting women? The famous ” I wonder what’s wrong with him” There must be something wrong with him. Oh well, on to the next guy. DON’T COME OFF DESPERATE!! It’s a huge turn off!

Have you ever tried walking up to a girl in a bar, club or even on the street and pulled your pants down? Of course not. You wouldn’t be reading this. You’d be in prison doing 2-4 for indecent exposure. You know what I’m getting at! Some of you have tried this tactic and no matter how big and beautiful it may be, you struck out! Didn’t you!? The famous number 2..

2- Don’t show ‘em your dingaling prematurely. I once posted an ad in the casual encounters section of Craigslist. The things I saw!! The horror! For example “Hi beautiful, if you like what you see, email me.” “Bet you haven’t seen one this big ever in your life” or the famous “Look how excited your picture made me” Now don’t get me wrong, it’s exactly what I was searching for posting in that section. But you see, women are looking for men. We’re interested in meeting YOU not it. If all we wanted was a weewee, we’d buy one at our local adult erotic shop and avoid the headaches. It’s an encounter with someone new we’re looking for. The excitement of the unknown. Make us want it. Don’t just hand it to us on a platter. We want to work for it a little. And don’t forget the obvious fact that with everything we’ve heard on the news, the stories of women getting raped and killed, we’re a little afraid to meet the men that come off as sexual predators. So please, KEEP IT IN YOUR PANTS UNTIL INSTRUCTED TO DO OTHERWISE!

So you’ve signed up on a random date site. You’ve put in your alias, your gender, and what you’re looking for. And now you avoid filling in the rest. Thinking that your alias “looking4mate72″ says it all and you don’t need to write anything else about yourself. Right? Did it work? No, it didn’t. Of course not. Don’t overlook number 3.

3- Tell us how interesting you are. If there’s nothing interesting about you, how can you get our interest? Make sense? Out of the 400 words you can enter in the field you chose to write “Hello, I’m looking for sex” well good for you, so is everyone else on here but at least they’re making an effort to attract the women. If you can’t think of anything interesting about yourself, chances are we won’t find anything either. These are the guys that go around saying “You know these dating sites are full of it. There’s no women, it’s all a scam. Dating sites are filled with real women dying to meet interesting dudes. There just don’t seem to be enough of them. Be interesting, and if you’re not, make something up! Make some sort of effort. With today’s technology we’ve been spoiled a little. But when it comes to meeting women, you have to spend a little time and energy. That’s the beauty. But if you can’t grasp this, don’t worry, I’m sure you’ll be able to download some beautiful woman on some torrent site in no time. We’re almost there. In the meantime…! keep…. you know.

Uploading your mug shot will probably not get too much attention from the sane women. You know the ones I’m talking about. No smile. The guy is starring into his webcam. You’re not sure if you’re still at the dating site or you accidentally clicked into the FBI’s most wanted list. A picture says a thousand words, make them good words.. number 4.

4- When it’s time to upload your pictures, don’t just turn on your cam and snap away. These have to be the dullest pictures I see. (I’d rather see their johnson, #2). Upload some real photos. A picture of you with your dog, you with friends, you at the beach. Something interesting! Somewhere you’ve been, something you’ve done. You, staring into your webcam, is not interesting at all. No one is going to sit there and go through 34 pictures you just took with your webcam in the dark. Creepy! You need to show us a side of you that’s going to grab our attention! Attraction is what it’s all about. NO MORE WEBCAM SHOTS!

Last but not least.. You’re going to hate this one I promise. But it’s as important or more important than the first 4… Pick a site you like, and become a member.

5- If you’re not willing to pay a few bucks a month to be a member, chances are I’m picking up the bill at the restaurant, bar, club, hotel or motel. The truth is, women rarely browse profiles of the free members that logged in once or twice. We like a little stability. We want to meet someone who’s been verified by the site. Avoids us a lot of trouble. What you’re telling women is; You’re not cheap, You’re a verified user, It’s safe to come in contact with you, you’re serious about meeting someone and again YOU’RE NOT CHEAP! If you can’t afford the membership, how are you going to meet up with me? Where will we be going? You can continue posting on those free classifieds “Anyone want me to pick her up with my car and go at it?” all you want, but you’ll be spending lots of lonely nights. And if it does work, I don’t want to see the gal that responds to that ad.

In conclusion, meeting women online is not that different from meeting women offline. Always remember that these are the same women you see in your everyday life. The difference is, it’s a lot easier to break the ice. So, why are you not succeeding at making that encounter? Is it because there are no women online? Of course not. There are as many women online as there are men. Avoiding these 5 deadly mistakes will increase your chances dramatically. Take advantage of the fact that most men are making these mistakes. There are plenty of fish in the E-SEA. Just remember to use the right bait. I’m currently on 3 dating sites myself. There are lots of single girls still looking for someone interesting to hook up with. I’m one of them. So please, if you come across me, don’t whip it out in my face, unless I ask you to!

Can a Sex Instructional Video Help Improve Your Love Life?

Whether you’re young or old, rich or poor, sex is probably one of the most talked about, if not controversial, topics in the whole world. Everyone needs sex, not just for procreation, but for pleasure and strengthening of a relationship as well. You can’t talk about romantic love without including sex in the equation so if you’re currently in a relationship and you want to make your love story last, you should definitely start working on your sex life. But how do you start? Though you’ll find a lot of great ideas online on how you can spice up your love life, there is really only one way that can help you take your sex life up a notch. Want to know what a sex instructional video can do for your relationship? Then don’t hesitate to read on.

Assuming that you and your lover both have open minds towards this subject, a sex instructional video can do wonders for your relationship. But do bear in mind that this option isn’t for everyone. If you’ve just started dating, make sure to have an open discussion with your partner on how he or she feels about using this sort of videos. This way, you’ll be able to avoid causing offense or any awkward moments that may lead to future misunderstandings in the relationship.

Helps You Become A Better Lover

Sure a sex instructional video may not be a necessity in making a relationship work, but it can help you make it stronger. A sex instructional video can help you become a better lover as it can provide you with tips and techniques that will make every sexual encounter worthy to be remembered. From oral techniques to different sex positions, you’ll be able to reinvent yourself as the ultimate lover once you’re done watching the video.

Allows You To Open Your Line Of Communication

Another benefit that you can get from incorporating the sex instructional video into your bedroom routine is that you’ll get a much more open communication line between you and your partner. Just by watching the video together, you’ll feel much more comfortable expressing what you want sexually and your partner will be more open to tell you what he or she would like to try out. When used properly, a sex instructional video will be able to help you form a stronger bond emotionally and physically.

If you’re interested in purchasing sex instructional videos, there are a number of ways that you can easily get your hands on them. First off, check out what your local adult bookstores or sex shops have on offer. Although these shops usually have an extensive line up of different adult videos that you can choose from, make sure that you choose a sex instructional video and not just a porn flick. If you’re not comfortable with the idea of visiting these shops or you just don’t have the time, start your search online instead. The great thing about purchasing online is that you not only have access to a wide array of different titles, but you’ll also get to shop anonymously.

Integrating Sexuality and Spirituality

Take a look at the world around us, and it becomes readily apparent that we are living in a time of simultaneous convergence and deconstruction. As there is a resurging interest in spiritual practices in many circles, there is also a breakdown in the patriarchal, hierarchical church structures. The specter of clergy sexual abuse intermingles with a worldview promulgated by the church about the nature of relationships and sexuality that no longer has meaning for people today – men and women, young and even middle-aged. The gender roles we were raised with have broken down and blurred. The image of nuclear family as mom, dad and 2.4 children has been superseded by a far greater spectrum of family possibilities. Bisexuality, androgyny, gender fluidity and polyamory are more and more common, especially among the twenty something generation.

Erotic energy is far more than sexual energy. It is life energy. As our culture has evolved splits between mind and body, head and heart, heart and pelvis and sexuality and spirituality, we have forgotten what it means to be fully alive.

“Erotic energy is not just about having sex,” continues Suzanne Blackburn, whose participation in sexuality and spirituality work has catapulted her personal and spiritual growth. “It is about living.” As we have become disconnected from our bodies, hearts, souls, spirits, one another and the divine, we have lost touch with many of the most beautiful pleasures and experiences possible in being human. So many people today are searching for meaning and purpose, most often expressed through job dissatisfaction, addictions and broken or troubled relationships. The rise of industrialization, urbanization, the nation-state, global dislocations, war and poverty all contribute to the sex-spirit split for us both individually and collectively.

“Because our culture has repressed sexuality so much, it is repressing everything,” acknowledges Blackburn. “People who have repressed sexuality have also repressed other areas of their lives. If you are not joyful about your sexuality, it is hard to be joyful about watching a sunset or watching kittens play. Hopefully, by breathing life into one, you breathe life into all of it. It’s like giving birth. When the baby comes out of the birth canal and takes a breath, the baby pinks up. When we open up, breathe deeply, have fun, when we dance, we pink up.” This backdrop provides fertile soil for an emerging movement working to integrate sexuality and spirituality.

Living in the Midst of a Paradigm Shift

Bob Francouer, a teacher of graduate and undergraduate classes in Human Sexuality at Fairleigh Dickinson University and the editor of the Encyclopedia of Sexuality notes, “Sexuality and spirituality have always been joined and interwoven from the very beginning of the human race. It is only in the last 2000 to 3000 years of Western civilization that the two have been separated. And they have not just been separated, but have been seen as antagonistic to each other. The split between sex and spirit came out of the Greek philosophy of dualism, and a dichotomous view of humans as matter/evil/female and spirit/good/rational/male.”

Just as Western civilization went through a period of major cultural upheaval 2000 to 3000 years ago, we are undergoing a period of major cultural turnover and paradigm shift now. “The institutional churches are losing their credibility in dealing with sexuality and spirituality. They are losing their authority,” continues Francouer. Francouer is well versed in the changing paradigm worldwide. The International Encyclopedia of Sexuality is written by 300 experts in 60 countries on 6 continents. The encyclopedia includes in depth reports of all aspects of sexuality. Each country has a section on religious and ethnic influences. Having collected information from many cultures all over the world, “it becomes very clear the spiritual traditions are undergoing major revolutions in their patterns of thinking. People in many cultures worldwide are thinking now not in terms of marital and procreational values, but in terms of individual self-enrichment and fulfillment. The spiritual is a very important part of the new perspective.”

Significant leadership in the sexuality and spirituality is coming from women. Francouer acknowledges, “As women in developing nations are exposed to Western concepts and experiences of human sexuality, they are linking their religious traditions with the visions of Western sexuality. As women become more empowered in third world nations, they are gaining more control over their bodies and sexuality, turning more to their spiritual heritage.”

“When the human psyche reaches the point of convergence and breakthrough into a new level of consciousness,” reflects Francouer, “diversity is the first thing that happens. The energy spreads out and explores all kinds of possibilities. There is no one ideal paradigm nor five ideal paradigms. All the models we have had in the past have real difficulties being applied in today’s world. So people are creating their own models and patterns.” The new paradigms created need to include and consider the collective as well as the individual.

A Quiet Movement and Its Roots

The emergence of the sexuality and spirituality movement is very quiet. For one, the subjects of sexuality and spirituality are each daunting. Many people are frightened at the thought of delving more deeply into either one. Too, Ani Colt, publisher of Spirituality and Sexuality magazine and founder of the Sexuality and Spirituality Union Network (SUNetwork) points out, “One of the things that energized a lot of movements was the common experience of feeling oppressed. A sense of oppression contributed to the emergence of blacks, women and homosexuals. But the oppression of our sexuality is not even recognized because sex is always in front of us. It’s in ads, on TV, in the movies. It is much more subtle oppression. As a result, it hasn’t given us that organizing energy that has created the feminist movement, the civil rights movement and the gay, lesbian, bisexual and trans gendered community.”

Sex educator, sex coach and author Loraine Hutchins adds, “Erotophobia/sex-negativity is hard to battle because it is all pervasive and systemic. It doesn’t affect any one group at the expense of another like racism. However, erotophobia, like racism, really hurts everyone and diminishes us all. I think sex-negativity is a function of heterosexism, a system of oppression created by patriarchy, involving male supremacy and mandatory heterosexuality. This oppressive system hurts men as well as women. The parallel is in looking at how whites are made less by racism, in contrast to non-whites. The hurts are different and need different remedies.”

“Organized religion is of little help in the sexuality-spirituality field,” Shalom Mountain Retreat Center founder Gerry Jud acknowledges. “I make a big distinction between religion and spirituality. Religion is about controlling behavior. Spirituality is about development and liberation of consciousness – becoming consciousness itself. Sex permeates all of life. When people are intimate with each other, touch each other, look into each other’s eyes, dance ecstatically with each other, the sexual component is out front. You cannot take an effective spiritual journey without taking into account that we are sexual beings.”

The first nationwide survey on sexuality and spirituality was conducted by Gina Ogden, a sexuality therapist and author of Women Who Love Sex: An Inquiry into the Expanding Spirit of Women’s Erotic Experiences. She is presently writing a book based on her survey results and hopes that the data will provide a baseline for broadening definitions of human sexuality, especially for women. Oggen contends that the field of sexology itself has reinforced the split between sexuality and spirituality. While she was a visiting scholar at the Radcliffe Institute, she happened upon the earliest sex surveys – conducted by women MDs. “The first survey, a century ago, was filled with hand-written responses about sexuality and spirituality,” notes Ogden. “But since the 1930′s when male scientists took over the surveying of sexual behavior, sex research became focused on what was easy to count and measure – performance by way of intercourse, orgasms and spasms, the mechanical part.” In her 25 years of experience as a clinician and workshop leader, Ogden found these mechanical features to be only a fraction of what women said was important.

“Almost 4000 women and men answered my survey with an outpouring of stories about sexuality and spirituality, about love and empathy and meaning and sex as a direct path to the divine. What is fascinating is that these stories echo the responses from those early surveys, as if they’re filling in almost a hundred years of blanks, the mysterious black holes in the history of the sexuality and spirituality movement. Maybe the scientific arm of the present day movement begins with Celia Mosher, who conducted that first survey in 1892!”

Ogden continues, “There is brain research coming out now because with advanced technology like MRI’s and PET scans we can really look at what is going on in the human brain over a period of time, like stop action. Researchers are finding that during sexual stimulation more than one center of the brain is lighting up. This demonstrates an organic basis for arguing that sexuality and spirituality are connected, that sexual response is multi-dimensional. This is in direct disagreement with all the sex research that focuses on performance, and the medical diagnostics that say if you can’t perform to their standards, it’s called dysfunction. There may be a political and social movement going on, but it’s important to remember that the capacity for connecting sex and spirit is in us. It is in our cells and our brain structure. It is built in. It has taken us 3000 years to remember it, to rediscover it, to validate it.”

A Wide Spectrum of Trainings and Practices

Many trainings, practices and methods have evolved to help people learn to work with sexual, spiritual, and life energies in their bodies, relationships and lives. These methods have been developed by visionaries who have built a community or network of people around them. There is some cross-fertilization between these communities, but more often the right hand doesn’t even know there is a left hand yet, never mind what it is doing.

Existing practices and trainings approach integrating sexuality and spirituality from many different directions. For example, the Human Awareness Institute approaches this work from an emotional and interpersonal direction, giving people skills for deeper intimacy and connection through its Love, Intimacy and Sexuality workshops. Tantric work, on the other hand, approaches the body and its energy field from a rootedness in spiritual philosophy. Sterling community work focuses on distinguishing the differences between male and female energy.

One of the common threads amongst the many approaches is the creation of a safe, sacred community circle. Joining together in holy ritual is a basic human need. We are starving for this kind of sacred circle. Trainings and workshops such as those profiled below provide help meet this need. I have selected a handful of significant programs in the sexuality and spirituality field, all of which have evolved over the past several decades. The purpose is to illustrate a range of what is available.

The Human Awareness Institute: Restoring the Purity of Heart and Soul

Stan Dale, 73, founder of the Human Awareness Institute, that has offered Love, Intimacy and Sexuality workshops worldwide for thirty four years, found himself on a path of integrating sexuality and spirituality while stationed in Japan when he was twenty seven years old. Having had a successful career in radio prior to being drafted, Stan worked at the Armed Forces Korea Network while in the service. He was put on temporary duty in Tokyo for the Far East Network, and was invited to a cast party for a motion picture being filmed there, “Joe Butterfly.” The cast party took place at a geisha house, a stunning 22-acre facility with trees, butterflies and flowers and buildings that looked like palaces. Through a twist of fate, he ended up living there for seven months when an old man who lived there invited him to stay. The old man told everyone at the geisha house to treat Stan like his son. The head geisha, nearly 70, gave Stan a quartz stone.

“She said to me,” remembers Stan, “‘What do you see?’ I said, ‘a stone.’ She said, ‘Yes…but come back and tell me what you see later.’ This went on for three days. I knew it was a trick. I examined it, had a magnifying glass, asked others what they saw…At the end of the three days, she asked me what I saw. Like a bolt of lightning, I saw the beauty of the universe. The words came out of my mouth.”

“At an event that night, the head geisha stood up. She gave me an honorific bow and said, ‘If you can see the beauty of the universe in a stone, you are now a geisha.’ I hadn’t known what geisha meant, but I sensed it was very special. The geishas taught me to look beyond everything I look at, to listen beyond everything I listen to, to go beyond what I touch. I learned an old adage to live by. If God wanted to hide, God would hide in human beings, because that is the last place we would think to look to find God.”

Stan learned to look for and see the spark of God, the magnificence that is every human being which may be camouflaged or obscured as we take the hard knocks of life. “As we walk through life in this world, the garbage keeps getting dumped on spirit,” notes Stan. Sufficient garbage gets dumped that people don’t recognize their own heart and spirit. “When something is in the body that shouldn’t be there, when it is taken out, it heals itself,” acknowledges Stan. “The heart heals itself. The soul heals itself.”

Just as the heart, soul and spirit get obscured by the garbage of life, sexuality has been equally misunderstood. “When we get the craziness and dirtiness out of the word sex, and put it where it belongs in spirit, heal and soul, then we get purity. “My vision is for every human being to be aware that their spirituality and sexuality is who you are, not something you get. My vision is for every person on this planet to see what is available when the garbage is indeed taken out.”

Shalom Mountain Retreat Center: Sustaining Spiritual Growth and Intimacy

Gerry Jud, now 83, is one of the true pioneers in the sexuality and spirituality movement. After getting a Ph.D at Yale, he started his career as a pastor in New Haven, CT. “I became interested in the question of why, in religious groups, the level of intimacy is exquisitely limited. People who get started in the field of a religious path soon level off. The journey comes to a halt. This troubled me as a church person, and so I began to study a way in which intimacy could be found among such people who are seeking a spiritual life, and how it could be sustained.”

He did his research and development work at Kirkridge, a major Protestant retreat center in Bangor, ME. Influenced by leaders in the human potential movement, including the folks at Esalen and in humanistic psychology, Gerry reached a turning point in his work when he worked with primal therapy techniques. “My first wife drowned after seventeen years of marriage. We had three little children. As a religious person, I did the best I could with that tragedy. It wasn’t until I got into primal scream work that I was able to release my anger. That changed everything for me.”

“That led me to see that people on their spiritual journey are not stuck in their conscious minds. They are stuck in the twilight,” a deeper subconscious layer that is often inaccessible to the conscious mind. For people to move forward in their growth work, Gerry recognized they needed to work at this deeper level, which he called the “twilight zone.” He developed a system in which he created an intensely tender, loving group of fifteen people. He would work with each person, one at a time, using deep breathing to put them into an altered state of consciousness.

Gerry initially started working with clergy and their wives, but his work soon grew to include people of all different religions and cultures. He eventually left his church job and founded Shalom Mountain Retreat Center in 1975. He found his work growing to include sexuality as it became apparent that the journey to God needed to include working with sexuality. Gerry’s pioneering work helped give birth to yet another body of work, the Body Sacred.

Suzanne Blackburn describes the Shalom experience as “a beautiful blend of all that we know in modern psychology and all that we know about love. It’s community at its best – a community that holds people to their truths and never withdraws love regardless of that truth.”

Body Electric School: Learning About Erotic Energies

The Body Electric School for Erotic Massage was founded by Joseph Kramer in the early 1980′s. Suzanne Blackburn speaks to the essential contribution of this work. “Kramer realized that men were compartmentalizing orgasm. For most people, initially men, if they were orgasmic, their experience happens within a five inch radius around the genitals. Kramer was interested in developing a body of knowledge to make orgasm a lot more – a full body, full person, full spiritual experience. He went on a quest to find out how to do this and created an experiential school for teaching about erotic energies.”

As we live with breakdown and deconstruction at so many levels of life, one thread that emerges is a hunger and longing, both spiritual and erotic. Suzanne Blackburn, reflects, “We are in a culture of dis-remembering in a lot of ways including the natural flow of erotic energies through and around us. Alex Jade of the Body Electric School uses the term ‘erotic amnesia.’ A lot of work is now available to help us re-member.”

Kramer drew upon ancient traditions and modern wisdom, and blended this knowledge in a new way that is accessible to men and women today. Body Electric work teaches people to wake up to their own bodies through breath, movement and touch, including Taoist erotic massage.

“Body Electric work translates ancient wisdom into practical exercises people can do in the here and now. We carry these ancient teachings in our bodies. It doesn’t take a whole lot of teaching for our bodies to wake up and remember. Our bodies hold the wisdom,” comments Blackburn. “In our culture it is generally not okay to take your clothes off with strangers, to talk about your genitals and erotic experience. The facilitators of Body Electric workshops are able to create a very safe space that allows people looking to be more alive in their bodies, to heal shame, open to more intimacy, celebrate living, and most importantly, to reconnect genitals and heart.”

Growing out of the AIDS devastation, the sudden linking of sex with death and attempting to recover from this, the school was exclusively for men until twelve years ago. “In response to women’s interests in this work, Joseph sought out women teachers,” chronicles Blackburn. The school currently offers a women’s program and a small mixed gender curriculum.

Sterling Men’s and Women’s Weekends: Distinguishing Between Masculine and Feminine Energy

An outgrowth of the human potential movement that offered us an opportunity to explore what it means to be human, Sterling men’s and women’s weekends provided a forum to explore what it means to be a man and what it means to be a woman.

Joe Boyer, who is involved in leadership in the Northeast region for this work, speaks to the evolution of the men’s and women’s weekends. “Throughout the history of the world, masculine and feminine roles were established that worked for many years. In more recent years of civilization, these roles have unraveled with politics, the industrial age, wars and all the conditions that called for the women’s movement. The women’s movement pushed us towards equality, but this posed new problems. The divorce rate went up. As a society, and as men and women, we had lost touch with the essence of the male and female roles that had worked for millions of years.”

Sterling work explores the essence of what it means to be male and what it means to be female, and what each gender’s roles and responsibilities can be. The goal is for men and women to be able to come together and have relationships that work. What is being distinguished here is energy – what is true masculine energy and what is true feminine energy. “The more unisexed a couple gets,” reflects Boyer, “the more it loses its vitality.” Rather than becoming androgynous, which implies a melding of gender energies, we need to become more clearly rooted in our masculine and female energies. “We need the distinction of masculine and feminine energies to understand who we are and what our inner selves are trying to tell us. This is not to say a man should shun his feminine energy. The key is learning to distinguish it.”

An example of the difference between male and female energy is the way each gender feels a sense of essential expression. Men feel a sense of essential expression when they provide and act. Through acting, men connect with the resources of the world, helping do what needs to be done to move things forward. Women feel a sense of essential expression when they nurture and foster connections. To nurture, you have to fully connect with another human being, to be able to plug into another, experience what they are feeling and empathize with them. In this way, women keep the relational fabric of society together.

When we look at the symbols for male and female, the male symbol is like an arrow, pointing or directing, and the female symbol includes a circle, bringing together and including. Men may take women’s nurturing efforts for granted. Unfortunately, women may not recognize the expression of emotional energy by men. When women nurture and when men work, each gender comes from their heart. This expresses an intention to emotionally be there for another. It is their way of trying to emotionally connect. For men and women to relate and get along, being able to recognize and appreciate these essential energies and their expression is fundamental.

A big piece of Sterling work is empowering people to become the men and women they always wanted to be. Our culture delivers lots of messages about what a man or women is supposed to be, but these messages may not ring true within an individual man or woman. “The Sterling Men’s Weekend is promoted as a modern initiation into manhood. This culture lacks this kind of initiation. The closest thing we have is the military. The military, however, makes you into the man they or we want you to be. The Sterling weekend is about making you into the man you always wanted to be.”

In order to serve the world at large, we need to have a clear strong sense of self, including a clear sense of gender identity. In this light, Sterling work helps men and women get rooted in that sense of self, so they can then come together to help shape a better world.

Conscious Relating: The New Paradigm for Love

While we have made progress in accepting same sex relationships between men and men and women and women, the culture as whole still offers a pretty narrow view of what constitutes an acceptable loving relationship. Our high divorce rate illustrates that even straight heterosexual men and women struggle in the most accepted form of relationship called marriage. Sexuality, intimacy and emotional needs are often difficult to talk about in relationships, and as a result it is hard for many people to be truthful in their expression of their sexuality.

Deborah Taj Anapol, a pioneer in the field of exploring conscious relating and integrating sexuality and spirituality, speaks of the new paradigm for love. “Right now what is occurring in consciousness is a marriage or blending between the masculine and feminine. With this shift comes an understanding of love as consciousness, rather than feelings for an object or love as something finite. The new paradigm for love is one of partnership, rather than a dominance/submissive form of relating.”

Relationships are based on honesty when they come from a climate of mutual respect and emotional safety. In the old paradigm, when relationships fail, partners often distance from themselves and each other with lies of omission and commission. When intimate relationships are formed from a utilitarian base, responding to social expectations, economic necessity, or gender role expectations, it is hard for men and women alike to find an authentic way of relating. When relationships are formed from a more spiritually integrated place, one comes to a partner freely, from a place of unconditional love and choice.

When people are ashamed or afraid to admit their needs to themselves, never mind their partners, it is hard to have a paradigm for love. Learning to know ones emotional, sexual and intimate needs becomes a spiritual journey. For many people, alternative lifestyle options are needed for authentic and vital relating and expression. As we move through a paradigm shift, forms of relationship may need to adjust to accommodate our individual and collective growth and change. Committed relationships may range from marriage to God with a celibate lifestyle to polyamorous relationships where people are both emotionally committed and sexual with more than one partner. Some people commit emotionally to a primary relationship with a person of one gender, yet engage sexually with another person or other persons of the other gender. Some individuals and couples choose to study and practice sacred sexuality to increase both their sense of connection and pleasure.

Bob Francouer comments about the shifting paradigm, “I think the outcome is going to be a much greater, more open, tolerant diversity. Once premarital sex was taboo. Today, in many circles, including mainstream circles and even churches, premarital sexual relationships are taken for granted. We will see different lifestyles that are socially responsible and fulfilling for the individuals. As we live into our seventies, eighties, nineties and beyond, some people will change their pattern of relationships.”

Where we will evolve to will be an interesting question. Women are taking a leading role in bringing an sex-spirit integration into the culture. More and more men are realizing they need to heal their wounded hearts to bring themselves more fully into their own lives and relationships. I am excited about the healing potential this emerging movement has for life on Earth. Perhaps, as we reconnect with our bodies, our hearts, our souls and one another we will indeed create a world that can live in greater harmony and peace.

The Boston Area Sexuality And Spirituality Network

In response to a groundswell of interest, the Boston Area Sexuality and Spirituality Network was founded in May 2002. The group exists to create a forum for people interested in integrating sexuality and spirituality to meet, dialogue and exchange resources. At the first meeting of BASSN, one of the themes was the need for an umbrella organization that embraced ALL forms of sexual, spiritual and gender expression. One member stated, “I can find a group of bisexual women pagans, but that group may not dialogue with transgendered Christians or hard-wired straight monogamous people.” BASSN offers an umbrella, welcoming people who identify with the many dimensions of gender identity, orientation, sexual expression and spiritual identity.

What BASSN members have in common is the desire to create a community or tribe where INTEGRATION is possible, creating a safe space where people can explore and learn from both differences and common threads. The group sponsors monthly meetings, which are like mini-workshops. Topics the group has addressed so far include: integrating sexuality and spirituality: what does it mean?, the essence of gender, safe touch, ways of loving: forms of relationship, and sexual energy.

The group will be organizing a Sexuality and Spirituality Leadership Forum, gathering together pioneers in the S and S field to share their visions and work, and to see how everyone can work together to support one another and this emerging field.

Vintage Adult Comics

As how they are obviously referred to, vintage adult comics are a reflection of ancient era or golden times. These are comics released in the 13th and 14th century and these days, they are difficult to get hold of. Other collectors aren’t just limiting themselves to the 1940-50′s collections, though. They follow until the 1970 releases of these comics.

Hundreds of comics were circulated in the golden age of magazines and literature. These materials were published using old kinds of papers. Vintage, as we hear of it, sounds valuable and rare. And yes, it definitely is rare to find some collections of books, magazines, comics or anything done five to seven decades ago.

The young adolescent and adult groups have let loose their inhibitions of browsing over these vintage adult comics that flaunt boldness, sexiness, sophistication and seventh heaven. The erotic side of life is presented in its creatively enticing manner through sexy pictures of women and passionate scenarios of couples in love and lust. There is no denying that men are continuous followers of these kinds of readable stuff. Sensual women are even getting open-minded to explore the so-called hobby but rarely do they declare such actuation.

As vintage comics like Batman, Flash Gordon, Superman, Green Lantern and Spiderman gained popularity back then, the emergence of vintage adult comics followed through their successes. Instead of heroic and funny themes, love and passion are usual concepts of the adult category of magazines and comics, that’s why they are for adults only. Thought not many people recognize it, comics are a serious business, too, just like movies, bars, Internet porn, among others.

Since the 1970′s, the worth of vintage adult comics has consistently multiplied due to their huge demand from investors and collectors. If you collect any of these vintage stuffs, you are likely to earn a good bit of dollars as they are usually appraised as valuable. It seems like a standard notion that if you own something vintage, you can benefit largely.

The approach employed in vintage adult comics is dependent on culture and lifestyle of a certain country it is being released. There are those that are too erotic that may not be appreciated by some. Basically, they’re identified to be of European, Japanese and American themes.

Vintage adult comics are usually of erotic conceptions and graphics, sometimes identified as artistic outputs of pornography. The sexuality of both men and women in the same setting is depicted as real as it can be to educate and stimulate the senses of the readers. Sensuality in a human being is but normal as long as it is done within grounds of matrimony. However, the world has accepted reality that bites, thus there isn’t any critical judgment aimed to those enjoying the art of making love out of marriage.

Human Sexuality and Gender Identity Is Different

A Transexual is an umbrella term, which includes cross-dressers, transgender and transsexual individuals. It is important to differentiate between sex and gender. Sex has biological foundations and is connected to hormones, genitalia and hormones among other things. Gender is a social construct, and it has to do with the internal sense of self and your chosen self-expression.

Cross-dressing individuals like to wear clothes associated with the opposite gender. Some of them just feel more comfortable in those clothes, while others consider it as another form of expression of their personality. Cross-dressing does not make you a transsexual.

Transsexuals usually have conflicting physical and psychological genders. The difference makes their lives quite hard, and leaves them with an important decision to make. They can choose to live with their biological sex, (which is the more difficult path for them) or they might choose to undergo rather radical procedures, such as hormone therapy or surgery, so they can live with their preferred gender.

A small vocabulary of sexual confusion:
FTM: Female to Male, a. k. a. Trans Man.
MTF: Male to Female, a. k. a. Tran’s Woman.
Gender Queer: Someone who identifies as other than male or female or who does not believe in binary gender.
Coming Out: Telling the truth about your sexual preferences for the first time.
Passing: Being perceived as the gender you are presenting.
Disclosure: Revealing your transsexual status to someone.
Stealth: Passing as non-trans without revealing Trans status.
Binding: Flattening your chest to create a male torso.
Packing: Wearing a device to create an external appearance of male genitalia.
Drag: Wearing clothes appropriate for the opposite sex.

The process of declaring romantic or sexual interest to anything other than the conventional heterosexual interest is called “coming out.” This process can start with fantasies, attraction to the same gender, perhaps sexual experimentation, and definitely feeling different from others in his/her peer group. This process is not easy and often leads to emotional distress and chaos.

Coming out is the process of admitting your sexual orientation to yourself and others. While coming out usually refers to the revealing of homosexual identity, heterosexuals can come out as well. Straight youth have a much easier task with “coming out,” however. LGBTQ (Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender, and Questioning) youth must come to terms with their sexuality and resolve the fears and doubts about it. The acceptance of our own sexual preference is an integral part of our sexuality, and of our identity as well. Coming out to others provides new problems however. Adolescents may face rejection from friends or family, they could be thrown out of their homes, or face being cut off from their families – financially or emotionally. This is not necessary. Some people are honored that the coming out youngster has confidence in them, and it is not uncommon that coming out brings parents and children closer.

It is interesting that when LGBTQ young people feel an attraction to a member of the same sex, they often get the reaction, “You are too young to know,” or “It is just a phase.” While no one questions a teenager’s attraction to a member of the opposite sex the same way.

Coming out has historical aspects as well. Before the gay revolution in the 1970′s, disclosing a non-heterosexual identity could lead to police charges. The Gay Rights Movement was a catalyst to change attitudes and policies, and the coming-out of celebrity and athletic role models in subsequent years has also helped. Today, almost half of the states in the United States recognize gay marriage, and the federal government has recognized it too.

Coming out can be daunting, because there is no easy way to tell someone about your sexual difference. A good idea is to tell only your closest friend or friends about it. You may need to know first what you are going to say, because people tend to have inaccurate perceptions and information about sexual differences. The lack of initial support or positive response from friends and family should not discourage you, because people usually need some time to get used to this new information and have to learn how to show their support. If you want to tell everybody about being different, it would be a good idea to tell the mouthiest of your friends.

Each year an increasing number of gay, lesbian and bisexual adolescents come out. Coming out is no less difficult today than it was 30 years ago. We just find a little more acceptance in some parts of society. Today, gay adolescents may not label themselves as LGBTQ, because they do not feel the need of a label, or they just try to avoid homophobic stigmatization.

Sexuality – Religions Society

Sexuality is a topic on which have been already written volumes of books, about which we can discuss through different prisms, so will sexuality in this text processed through some common features.

To even be able to talk about sexuality, it is necessary to define what is sexual intercourse. All we use to mean by sexually is penetration. However, ask yourself what your value system mean by sexual intercourse.

Research shows that 80% of anal sex considered sexual relations, but only 40% of oral sex is placed in a sexual relationship. Given the foregoing, it is clear why many controversies arise when discussing sexuality and it is therefore difficult to provide for unique definition of sexual relations.

Sexuality is made up of all the stimuli, emotions and experiences that leads a person to physical sexual arousal, and thereby contribute to increasing sexual desire and / or behavior. The majority of leading experts from this field agree that it is not only about the instinctive, physiological and physical phenomena.Human sexuality is very complex psychological and sociological phenomenon.

Recently sexuality attracted increasing attention, which are particularly contributed to changes in social norms, the influence of feminism, the rise of sexually transmitted diseases, among which occupied a significant place HIV / AIDS and increase care for reproductive health. Sexual intercourse has long tabooed, is reserved for the intimate area of each individual and we will find it difficult to talk openly about sexual intercourse, and not to mention the specific difficulties that arise during the relationship.Why this is so, we can observe several major influences that we are exposed from the very childhood.

Religion and sexuality

Religion is a big influence on each individual. Religion aims to define the moral rules in a sexual relationship. According to the religious concepts of sexual intercourse is the sole objective of the extension types. Any other form of sexual relationship represents the amoral behavior. So it is understandable why homosexuality, sex during menstruation, contraception and sexual relationships for pleasure as impermissible in the religious sense and in violation of the moral (religious) norms. I personally consider the religious type of lifelong repressed sexuality to be the most destructive kind of self abnegation.

Society and Sexuality

A society in which every individual grows up also determines what is a sexual relationship and what it should be. The Company aims to develop standards, rules and norms. Norms are shared by the people in “normal” and deviant-”abnormal”, depending on whether the norms and standards of society or not. Every company is subject to change throughout its history, including the Victorian era, “immoral” woman was identified as one that experienced an orgasm, and today women seeking help for the inability of reaching orgasm. It should be emphasized that the sexual norms of relative and subject to change and vary from society to society. Violation of these norms can lead to different social reactions. What is sexual conformity in a society, the second may be a sexual deviation, the “violator” of norms may experience different destinies in a way that the behavior may be condemned as immoral, such as crime and disease. Sexual behavior and attitudes related to sexual life were strongly shaped by the culture in which we live, and determined the influence of parental education, the influence of peer groups, schools, books, magazines. Sociological studies show significant cross-cultural differences in gender, sexuality and sexual relationships.

Cross-cultural differences

Polygamy in the Islamic world and in ancient time of India is not prohibited, but only for men (a man can have four wives simultaneously, and in practice to decide only the second marriage to men who are financially afford it). With polygamy, the Qur’an mentions temporary marriage for pleasure. Divorce is accepted in some Islamic countries.

After the arrival of Mao Tse-Tung came to power in China comes to big changes – the repression of sexual conduct with the aim of directing all human forces in the “revolution”. 1980th The manual was published by the government authorized that to 74 by explaining the essential “sexual knowledge” (eg, recommendations for frequency of sexual relations between young couples).

In China, the government’s primary concern is control of population growth, which automatically affects all aspects of relationships and marriages in China.

In ancient Greece the love is seen through the dualistic concept: the spiritual love of agape (the highest form, spiritual, altruistic love), and a natural love of eros (erotic love, the love that comes from physical attraction).

Pre-Christian philosophers and Christian era, taught the values of life are excluded sexuality. With the advent of Christianity, there is the ascetic view of sex and other pleasures.

The Protestant Reformation made the first change in the views, sexual relations not only serve the purpose of reproduction but also for pleasure.

Research shows differences in the frequency of sexual intercourse. Gebhart 1971 states that in Western societies a few times a week (two to five times), while members of the tribe Lapcha five to ten times, but during one night. (sounds good isn’t it):)

Days of the New Guinea have sex once every two years.

Different cultures in different ways to perceive and extramarital sexual relations.

Aboriginal extramarital sexual experience as a welcome experience for the husband and wife, because it kills the boredom and routine, and thus increases the mutual ties.

Tribe Marques from Polynesia, certain Eskimo tribes do not have anything against extramarital sex, believe that offering sexual services to guests-chance part of the behavior of a good host.

For some communities extramarital sexual activity are acceptable for men.

Culture has also impact in terms of sexuality of children and premarital sex.

In some vedic hindu religion and most sub cultures,it is allowed sexual intercourse solely (not other aspects of sex) once a month in a presumed fertile day of a woman between a married couple,and after a sacred ritual. Sex is consider sacred solely if for purpose of begetting a religious children, otherwise considered a sin. Sex for pleasure only in Gaudiya Vaishnava tradition is considered illicit, and thus a sin.

A large number of tribes on the islands of the South Pacific, particularly approves child sexuality (eg, one of the children’s games is a common masturbation).

Chewa Tribe (Africa), early sexual life among young people consider to be essential for future fertility and he also approved. Lepcha tribe (southeastern part of the Himalayas) believe that the girl should be sexually active earlier (most girls at 11 or 12 years sexually active).

However, the tribes Kwon (New Guinea) forbidden for boys to be caught with an erection, so that boys of this tribe go so far as to learn how to pee without having to touch the hands of the penis.

In Middle Eastern cultures (the majority of the Islamic religion), disclosure of any part of the female body is strictly prohibited. In Malaysia, if it is on TV a man and woman (both clothed) show themselves in a room longer than 3 seconds, it implies that they had sexual intercourse. Showing these scenes is prohibited, except in the case of the married couple.

Laws and sexuality

Do not forget the laws that attempt to answer the question what is normal and what is deviant behavior. Of course, the laws vary among cultures. The laws have two objectives, namely the prohibition and protection; goals are linked: the need to ban most “wrong” behavior in order to protect “weaker” members of society.

Finally we can summarize: the area of human sexuality is extremely complex phenomenon which can not be viewed separately from the culture in which we live and which exist certain rules of conduct. The concept of sexuality is subject to change in so far as changing norms, attitudes and behavior of society. Social impacts on human sexual behavior can be approached on several levels:

Macro-level – the impact of society as a whole, powerful social institutions:

Religion – clear shapes and forms of sexual behavior, setting standards, (eg, attitude toward premarital sex and illegitimate, homosexuality,masturbation, sex for pleasure…etc.)

economic conditions – the nature and structure of the economy affects the human sexuality

family – the socialization processes

Medical – doctors determine what is healthy and good for us

legal system – the law determines the standard (what is required by law only correct) mechanisms of social control.

Subcultural level – social background, class or ethnic group, (unwritten, but not negligible, rules and norms that influence behavior)

Interpersonal level – socialization processes, the relationship with your partner.

Individual level – denied by the personal thoughts and desires, sexual orientation and sexual scripts that we learned.

If we are believers in God,or members of some social community group where sex solely for pleasure is prohibited, should we embrace our sex desires and enjoy with our partner anyway knowing that we are not doing any harm to others or ourselves with it? Or should we artificially repress our sexuality due to the given norms?

To bring this to an end: it remains that sexual energy is the strongest energy we posses in this world. I stand that it should be enjoyed, somehow it should be regulated, we should not suppress it, is not sinful because it is part of our body and mind, and as such can be used or abused like everything else in life.

Science Supports the Need for Casual Sex Flirting

Casual sex movies make it all seem so easy. Two people meet up at a bar, share a quick drink, and then are seen passionately bouncing off hallway walls as they try to get each other’s clothes off. But is it really all so simple? And if it is, then why aren’t all bar room hallways bursting at the seams with horny hookups? The answer is…they’re not and the science behind attraction and a woman’s desire for casual sex gives a little insight into why.

In several studies, the original one conducted in 1989 and a follow-up one conducted more recently, both men and women were asked if they would have casual sex with a platonic friend – a friends with benefits arrangement – or if they would have casual sex with a complete stranger. In both studies it showed that men were more likely to agree to a quickie than their female counterpart. So if you are a man and want to get a more favorable response to the question, “Will you go to bed with me?” there are few basic things that you need to understand about the women who are most likely to say yes.

Whether you meet a potential partner through an adult online dating site, through a friend, or in a pub, the basics of getting that person to agree to a one night stand or no strings attached relationship include a little flirting. Yes, even with casual sex you need a little flirting.

Science has suggested two theories explaining what women look for. The first theory reaches back to our caveman roots and the evolutionary reasons for having sex – survival of the species. In this explanation the woman needs to be choosy about their hook up mate since they expect them to stick around to help change diapers and buy formula. They want a man they can depend on.

The second theory is one that we can better get our minds around when talking about casual sex and that is the Pleasure Theory. We are all hardwired to pursue pleasure. This is the type of wiring that you guys need to stand up and take notice of. Yes, woman will be more likely to say yes to a casual relationship when they perceive that they are going to get a little pleasure from it…or more likely, a lot of pleasure. Women want to orgasm and they will be more willing to give it a shot with a guy (or girl) that is likely to provide it.

So let’s put the two theories together and create a better mousetrap. Guys, if you want casual sex then you need to convince a woman that they can depend on you to give them an orgasm!

How is this done? Well, to discover that you may just want to follow me and get some advice on some good old fashioned flirting and seduction. That is something that never goes out of style no matter if it’s casual sex or true love sex that you are after.

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